Saturday, January 31, 2009

Calling All Artists!

This is a little shout-out write up of a website that I love using and exploring. Carbonmade is a site that you can create and manage an online profile. At the moment, they asked for bloggers who use Carbonmade to write about it. I'm not an eloquent master of the English language, but Carbonmade deserves the love! And they asked nicely.

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Carbonmade is a site I found out about through a friend and fellow NC State textile student and dork, Jenna. I shall clarify, she's a graduate student now, and I'm an alum. I stumbled upon the link on Facebook, and curiosity led me to clicking. I was pleasantly surprised to not only be able to see her portfolio - I had never had the chance to see it before and it's a very good one - but to see such a clean, well-designed website. I've dabbled in website building and while I'm capable at a simple Dreamweaver website, I'm not exactly a website artist.

Realizing the convenience (if not the value, at that point) of having an online portfolio, I signed up. This was almost a year ago, exactly. February 20th, 2008. Having had a small, but growing, apparel and fabric design portfolio started, the free option was perfect. But before I knew it, with the time I had taken off from school, I had more and more projects created. Finally being able to play catch-up on projects from NCSU that had never had the time for actual portfolio creation, all of a sudden my portfolio went from small to at least average!

Carbonmade has a huge value to me. I live in North Carolina. Yet I studied and graduated from college in apparel and fabric design. All ye creative people know that these two fields aren't exactly booming in North Carolina. In desperate need for work experience, I started sending out resumes for summer internships last spring. With some luck, a small company was interested in me. Financially, I could not afford to go to New York to interview, so instead, through my online portfolio and a phone interview, I got an internship! While my actual design skills aren't vital for being an intern, it's something companies desired to see. Simply having this web address on my resume is allowing companies far and wide to view the little ole portfolio of a North Carolina girl. Whether they love it or hate it, more eyes are seeing it, and in my mind, that holds more value than I can imagine!

Another smaller value to Carbonmade is allowing me to share work with friends - they can give their input, criticism, praise, to help me refine and rethink how I look at my portfolio.

So I thank Carbonmade - not only is the website incredibly easy to use, they also have amazing customer service. Yes, this was actually me, and I could not be happier with the response I received from you guys!

Come check me out, strangers and friends alike! Share your thoughts about my portfolio, and if you're an artist of any kind, check out the site in general.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

It's sort of cute...

or sad?

I'm talking about how excited I am for New York. A paid internship! Hopefully some success in finding a permanent job! A cuuute apartment in Astoria with some sweet (Southern) girls (at least they seem to be)!

Tonight, it seems real.
My dad "gave his blessing" finally.
I'm buying stuff for the apartment.
I got approved for the apartment!!!!
We're discussing renting a cargo van or small truck and driving up so that we can take stuff instead of shipping it.
Talking with the roommates as a DEFINITE third roommate and not a "maybe" roommate.

I'm so excited, my nerves seem raw to the touch. It's a great thing, but I'm exhausted and yet can't relax. Last night, I barely slept (can anyone say stressed about the apartment approval/signing my and my parents' life away?). Today, we went to the bank, had papers notarized, faxed. I spoke with the broker to confirm she got the fax. We went by Budget Rental to check out prices and options. (Budget = HELLA cheaper than U-Haul.) We spent time at my aunt's - vamping up my mother's resume, writing a small cover letter/note, looking up plane tickets and other costs. Then we stopped at USPS in the mall and mailed out the official guarantor affidavit and my mom's resume stuff. And then we ended up in JC Penney - I found some kitchen cooking utensils, some cheapo cute plates and bowls, towels, curtains, a rug, blah blah blah. Oh and we fixed dinner once we got home. And then had to give my father the rundown on the plans and updates, and showed him pictures of the apartment.

Although he seemed pretty underwhelmed by the apartment, that's my father.

I'm just soooooo excited! My only wish was that I had time to spend a solid few days in Raleigh. I love and miss my friends, but I just don't have much time to spare before Wednesday. Biggest bummer ever.

Pleasantly surprised

My hopefully new apartment in Astoria. A bit dated, yes, but for a 10'x9' room for $725, it's pretty damn good. Also a bit further from the subway than I had hoped, but Hopstop estimates it's a 6 minute walk, so it's not like it's horrible.

I'm returning the application today, and wish me luck! We have to submit tax information, and being a small business owner means taxes don't always paint the picture so beautifully.

Monday, January 26, 2009


I don't think I can put into words how excited I am.

I got a paid winter internship in New York City!!!!! Like, meaning I'm starting February 9th. :eek:

I've also got an apartment already arranged! My aunt Susie's neighbor's daughter works for Ralph Lauren in NYC. She has friends from college that were looking for a third roommate for an apartment in Astoria. They found what sounds to be a nice house - big den, good kitchen, three bedrooms of three different sizes (perfect for our three different budgets), porch and backyard of our own! For what sounds like a small bedroom with a wall of closet space, (storage FTW) it's $725/month including utilities.

One girl said she has most of the shared furniture taken care of, which is awesome for me. All I'll need is a bed and mattress, along with a few things like a nightstand, maybe a bookshelf?

I'm so incredibly excited, but I still have to talk to my dad about it, which sort of freaks me out. He pretty much nixed the idea a few weeks ago, when it was still just a baby idea. But considering that my pay can cover rent and food and that, right now, I have a good 2/3 of the money I'd need for the first month (725*3), I'm not as worried. Really, just the cost of moving/driving up there and a bit more is what I have to worry about.

Seriously, two weeks. To finish and print out my portfolio, to figure out how we're getting up there and back, etc etc etc. Exciting, stressful, crazy. And I'm still a bit worried about not having seen at least a picture of my bedroom, ya know? I can deal with small spaces, but it would just be nice to have an idea of what I'm getting.

So, YAY! And worries about the logistics. But mostly YAAAAAAAAY!

Friday, January 23, 2009

Testing, testing, 1, 2, 3. First mobile post?

Saturday, January 10, 2009

My mother is driving me crazy...

Not just the typical "Why the HELL am I still home?" "When can I escape?" feeling (although I've felt that quite a bit since the holidays are over), but she's gotten on a tangent today.

So, I did some Obama-themed fabric designs for my knit design class this semester, and today I was working on the portfolio pages for it. My mom saw them (she's seen the designs before), and came up with quite a cute/awesome idea - I should try to get some more of the fabric knitted out and make a basic shirt out of them for Sasha and Malia Obama, and mail them to them. I'm definitely going to try to do so (although I'm still skeptical that they'll actually get them, but whatever, that's me).

But then, later tonight, she kept going on about the fact that I should basically start my own business doing these fabrics. And that I should try to work out a deal with the College of Textiles to be able to get large quantities of the fabric knit out. Or find a manufacturer...or, you know, invest in my own machine. (Yeah, I have no idea how much they cost, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was $50,000+.) Because, you know, I don't have anything really lined up at the moment, why not take advantage of the trend while it's here. Scarves, t-shirts, imagine the possibilities!

Okay, I understand the idea. I know it's good to catch a wave while it's here. But she just would not shut up about it. Saying I could work out a deal with NCSU, etc. I just don't have that entrepreneur spirit (at least not like so many of the Hanhans), and I guess I just...I don't know. I think the fact that she Would. Not. Shut. Up. about it makes me even less open to the idea. Also, I'm really so ready to get the hell out of Greensboro, it's not even funny.

Yes, I'd love to make some more scarves and even sell them on Etsy, but it just feels like such a hassle to get it done in the lab, like I'm eating up a ton of the technicians' time.

Am I crazy? Are these designs really as awesome/sellable as people claim? These are the patterns, texture-mapped onto these garments. (Meaning Urban Outfitters designed those garments, not me. I only designed the patterns.)

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, etc etc etc!

So it's been a while.
Graduated from college / Moved back to Greensboro / Christmas / New Years / Aunt from Thailand visiting...

And now to the real world of job hunting.

Besides going crazy at home, I didn't have a real reason to post except for this. A meme/note thing started on Facebook, I wanted to share it to the few other people that might read my blog not on Facebook. Feel free to do your own version of this, if you want!

After both Brittany and Sheena tagged me with this note, I'm finally getting around to doing it. I apologize if this rambles but when I'm in an introspective, I get talkative.

Directions: Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write a note with 16 random things, shortcomings, facts, habits, goals, quirks, secrets, plans for world domination, etc. At the end choose 16 people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them. You have to tag the person who tagged you.

1. I adore my friends. I honestly didn’t realize it so much until I returned to Raleigh and have reconnected and strengthened the bonds I’ve had. Like, I don’t know what I would do without you all.

2. But, as much as number one is true, I’m ready for a change. I honestly cannot wait to find a job in a large city and I guess do the cliché “spread my wings”. I really adored New York City, and I think I’m just a big city gal in general.

3. The economy, and finding a [good] job, freaks me the hell out. I generally worry about money a LOT. I know I shouldn’t, but I feel so much guilt for the expense I’ve put on my parents, throughout my whole life. Medical costs out the wazoo, this past summer in New York, life in general.

4. Especially lately, I crave some sort of male attention. 24 years of nothing (no dating, no kissing, nothing) has finally caught up, and I find myself yearning for a romantic relationship… Even while battling my body image (“Why would someone be attracted to me???!”)

5. I’m a sponge when it comes to my music, book and movie choices. Maybe it’s just because my friends have damn fine taste, but I’ve found my very best music, reads and films through friends. And I’m always open for suggestions.

6. This is stolen directly from Brittany, but only because it rings so incredibly true to me. “I tend to care way too much about how other people think about me in the sense that I don't want to make them mad or feel hurt by me.”

7. My dream job? Something creative (I love designing fabric prints/patterns) in a big city, pays well enough, and benefits like vacation time. So that I can finally travel like I’m so desperately yearning to.

8. I miss Alix. I still have no idea why “the big man upstairs” took her away, and I don’t think it’ll ever make sense to me. Nor do I hope to ever forget her. I hope I can move onto a more hopeful way of thinking about it, but I still don’t ever want to forget her. But it still makes me sad… I just try to…keep it in the background, faded out. Every so often, it makes its way to the forefront of my mind and it takes a while to shake the feelings.

9. I’m such a dork for board games. Cranium, Apples to Apples (JUST played that for the first time tonight), really, anything. Nothing would make me happier than a night of board games with close friends. I can’t explain it, but I love it.

10. I stress about weight loss. Being back at school slowed it down so incredibly much, I realize that my bad habits from before my surgery are still here, and I freak out about it stopping. Not because there’s some absolute ideal size I want to be, but more honestly, in disappointing my parents (who funded the whole damn thing) and family.

11. My feet are freakin oddities. Shoes are my favorite things in the world, but it’s about impossible to fit the width of my feet in CUTE shoes, and that makes me sad.

12. I don’t drive, and I can’t explain why I don’t. I often told people (in Raleigh) that I just didn’t have a car in Raleigh, but I don’t even have a license. (Yes, bad bad bad.) In high school, the idea of driving never interested me, oddly enough, and I’ve let it slowly scare (?) me. I just have no desire to do so, and losing Alix in a car accident increased my general disdain/fear of driving. I really don’t know where/why it started, but I’ve just put a mental block on the whole idea, and I know it’s not good. (But it’s one of those things that I DON’T want friends/family teaching me. When the time comes, I’m going to pay someone/a driving school to teach me.)

13. In regards to number twelve, the not driving drives (ha ha) me insane when I’m home. I’m such an independent person, but in Greensboro (especially where I live), I’m pretty much STUCK here. Nothing is in close walking distance, in terms of stores or even bus stops. I’m totally not ashamed to use public transportation!

14. I really do love food. I enjoy cooking and baking for people, having people over for meals, going out with friends to nice restaurants. It’s more of the whole experience than the food alone, and even after my surgery, I refuse to separate it from my life.

15. I love being near water – oceans, lakes, even just hot tubs and pools. It’s the most relaxing experience, and the natural forms are usually such beautiful sights.

16. I have a tendency to pick apart myself and my choices in my brain, and I don’t like to share it with other people… Unless it’s something like this or a blog, where only people that would WANT to hear/read about it will. I don’t like burdening others with my constant mental preoccupations.

I choose (and diplomatically list alphabetically):
Blaire: because you’re totally sweet and although we haven’t known each other long, we clicked.
Christine: because we definitely have a history, and some sort of crazy friendship I can’t quite explain.
Evan: because all my poppy guilty pleasures don’t feel so guilty when I’m with you!
Jen: because you’ve kept me sane while in Greensboro…
Jenna: because, although I knew you were awesome before, you made my last semester of college amazingly fun!
Lisa: because you make me laugh, and you have a great taste in drinks.
Mano: because you’re my favorite cousin, and I just adore you.
Meghan: because you’re totally sweet and I want to know more about you.
Misha: because you and I have similar tastes and your sarcasm is awesome.
Mor: because you’re an absolute visionary, and you inspire me.
Ricky: because you’re a nice guy that entertains me. That says quite a bit.
Sara: because I honestly don’t know what I would do without you in my life.
Sarah Ewald: because you have great taste and a lot of the balls I want to have one day.
Sarah Wheeler: because you were my freakin mentor first semester freshman year and we’re still friends!
Shira: because you took me in (as a virtual stranger) this summer, and helped me spread my cosmopolitan wings.
Suhad: because of Barbies, Barbies, Barbies years ago. And because I recently realized how awesome you are.

Oh, two more. My original taggers!
Brittany: because we totally are soulmates.
Sheena: because no matter how long we go without seeing each other, we fall right back into sync in a comfortable friendship.

Everyone tagged is obviously awesome, because I wouldn’t just want anyone to know all this stuff about me…

And I included the list of tagged friends because, well, I love them. :)