Insane. Amazing. Juggle!

 

My life currently summed up in three words. (That last one is more like "Juggle, bitch, juggle!") But if you want a little bit more...

• Three weeks into work and really is a juggle. I feel a bit in over my head (in terms of skills) but I'm trying to prove myself and make myself indispensable right now. Last week was especially insane and the company is trying to find the right balance with me as well.
• Last week was "Social Media Week" in NYC. What does that mean, you ask?  Lots of open bars, interesting panels and good friends. Tried to balance attending the important to me stuff - a fashion panel or two - with the just-can't-miss fun stuff. Last night's closing party / Patrice's birthday party was pretty much perfection. An insane amount of dancing and free liquor made for a perfect end to my week.
• Oh, and last night was also my one year anniversary in New York City.
• Speaking of indispensable, I'm reading Linchpin by Seth Godin right now. Game changer. For real. Once I read Emily's review, I had to have it. If you're doing anything creative at all in your life, put it at the top of your reading list. Oh, and give yourself a D.
• And, still rolling along with Babes Who Brunch. Lots of great meals, and truly happy to have met and continue to get closer to Melissa. Even when life feels like it's in the john, she has a great, great spirit to her. And knows and appreciates goooood food.
• Oh, one more memorable note to my life. My friends. Seriously, I cannot even begin to express the awesomeness that surrounds my life right now. There was so much congratulatory joy from you all when I got this job, I was truly overwhelmed. Thank you. No really, you make my life so worth it on a daily basis.

Drum Roll Pleeeease!

A new project for 2010 has begun, and I couldn't be more excited!

Melissa, a sweetheart and new friend, have begun a new blog together, Babes Who Brunch. I hope my dear readers will follow the link and check out our site, ideas, etc. If you're in the NYC area, are a babe and want to brunch with us, please please please let us know! I don't know what this will turn into, but it's an exciting little side project for the new year. (And yes, I am trying to keep with the Ten in 10 goals while brunching.)

Woah... It's 2010!

To my readers, I wish you a Happy New Year!

Nick McGlynn's kickass New Years party right over Times Square.

While I look like a hot mess in this picture, I'm happy as a clam. This was my evening last night, with so, so, SO many of my new friends. 2009 rightly sucked for many reasons, but when it comes to the connections I've made in my life, well damn, this is one lucky lady right here. So thank you, to all of you. You know who you are, you know you're greatly loved and you know that you've made my year about as great as it could be.

It is really nice to feel wanted

Tonight's Twestival was pretty awesome. It was really nice to just work on something, have a focus, and have people appreciating the effort. So, I admit it, I enjoy a bit of attention and appreciation. Not a ton, just a little.

Now, I have to get back to facing the fact that I am unemployed, and need to find a job. Soon. But, for now, I am going to take my grandma self to bed, for I am le tired.

A side note...

A friend gently reminded, or requested, that I try to blog more about life and less about cooking. And she's right. I hope the few people that read my blog for me and not food still keep up, but I'll try to interject more blogs about my thoughts, my life, all of that truly fascinating stuff more often...

I'll be honest, it feels like the same old, same old. I'm still struggling with my eating, and to actually lose weight. I still want to try the dating game, but no desire to go to a bar to attempt to flirt with guys. Seriously, how does this thing work? I still have my small bouts of missing Alix. Yes, still. I don't think that will ever stop, honestly. That reminds me! Her mother randomly IMed me one day. Before I saw it, she signed off. I need to get in touch with her, let her know what's going on in my life. And I'm still incredibly proud of what Omar is doing up here in the city. I'm still enjoying my job, if it's not stressful. I'm also stressing on what the future holds. Li, the assistant designer on maternity leave, left mid-March and was taking three months off. That would mean that in a month, she's scheduled to return. Will she? Won't she? I don't know. What I do know is that I need to get the resume revised and restart (finally) job hunting.

Yes, it feels good to simply blog. But, I admit, there's one. More. Recipe. To be posted shortly. What can I say? Cooking is ingrained in me!

Well there goes a month!

Sorry everyone, but it seems like February and March have flown by. That is probably because:

- I'm working 40 hours a week
- Sara came up to see me during NCSU's Spring Break - Saturday Feb. 28th to Thursday March 5th. It was her first time in the city and it was really an amazing week. I love that girl, and I'm gonna miss her! (She got into Univ of Manchester for grad school! Go her!)
- Thursday March 5th, the evening Sara left, my younger brother Omar came up for an indefinite amount of time. He is looking to get a job at a restaurant in the city, and from the sounds of it, he does have an opportunity at this place called Centro Vinoteca. (Opportunity meaning today is his first day of work!)
- Saturday, Shira left for an indeterminate amount of time - at least until August? Which bums me out. The reasons she's going back to LA are absolutely fantastic ones, but I mean, she has a special place in my heart. She took me in last summer without knowing a whole lot about me and letting me totally invade her space and privacy.

So...what does that mean? Well, that probably means that we're going to look for a place together. My roommates are pretty badass, as is this apartment, but this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for Omar and there is absolutely no reason he should live with some random sketchy find on Craigslist. Nor could he afford a studio (I mean, really, who can?!)

That's sort of scary...the prospect of moving again. The expenses, the general labor, finding a sublet for this apartment. But I spoke with Jessica and Jennifer tonight, and they're totally supportive. They understand the situation, with it being family, and aren't offended by the move, if it happens. So, that makes me feel better. They will also let anyone they know about the room being available.

Work has been really good. The week Sara was up here, a large group of Garan employees (designers, mostly) were trend shopping in Europe. So the week before was crazy, and these past two weeks, now that they're back, is sort of crazy. They bought tons and tons of clothes for trend research, and even more pictures, so there's a lot to sort through, hang up, print out, and on and on. I want to, at some point soon, try to discuss with Lori, my boss, about any openings for permanent employment and/or the general timeline as an intern. They seem completely open to me staying there as long as I want to - they have the need for an intern, and I think I'm doing a pretty good job. I just have absolutely NO idea how to approach the topic. And with everyone (including Lori) preparing for trend meetings (sometime at the end of March), it's probably not really the best time to do it.

If anyone has any suggestions whatsoever on the best way to do that whole thing - introduce the topic (of meeting), and then the meeting in general, my ears are open.

Besides being sick - a month in NYC being surrounded by sickies - at work, at the apartment - I finally got sick on Friday. So, let's hope it leaves me soon, kthx? Anyway, what was I saying? Oh yeah, besides being sick and busy, um, not much else happening. I feel like such a grandma, especially on the weekends. I don't really go out, but I mean, especially Friday nights, I'm tiiiiiiired! It's exciting living here, but exhausting at times.

Oh, and a random high point of my evening? Even being sick, this recipe delighted my taste buds. If you're seriously jonesin for spring to get here and FAST, fix this. It helps.

Good night everyone. The old fart has to pack her lunch and get to bed before it gets much later!

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, etc etc etc!

So it's been a while.
Graduated from college / Moved back to Greensboro / Christmas / New Years / Aunt from Thailand visiting...

And now to the real world of job hunting.

Besides going crazy at home, I didn't have a real reason to post except for this. A meme/note thing started on Facebook, I wanted to share it to the few other people that might read my blog not on Facebook. Feel free to do your own version of this, if you want!

After both Brittany and Sheena tagged me with this note, I'm finally getting around to doing it. I apologize if this rambles but when I'm in an introspective, I get talkative.

Directions: Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write a note with 16 random things, shortcomings, facts, habits, goals, quirks, secrets, plans for world domination, etc. At the end choose 16 people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them. You have to tag the person who tagged you.

1. I adore my friends. I honestly didn’t realize it so much until I returned to Raleigh and have reconnected and strengthened the bonds I’ve had. Like, I don’t know what I would do without you all.

2. But, as much as number one is true, I’m ready for a change. I honestly cannot wait to find a job in a large city and I guess do the cliché “spread my wings”. I really adored New York City, and I think I’m just a big city gal in general.

3. The economy, and finding a [good] job, freaks me the hell out. I generally worry about money a LOT. I know I shouldn’t, but I feel so much guilt for the expense I’ve put on my parents, throughout my whole life. Medical costs out the wazoo, this past summer in New York, life in general.

4. Especially lately, I crave some sort of male attention. 24 years of nothing (no dating, no kissing, nothing) has finally caught up, and I find myself yearning for a romantic relationship… Even while battling my body image (“Why would someone be attracted to me???!”)

5. I’m a sponge when it comes to my music, book and movie choices. Maybe it’s just because my friends have damn fine taste, but I’ve found my very best music, reads and films through friends. And I’m always open for suggestions.

6. This is stolen directly from Brittany, but only because it rings so incredibly true to me. “I tend to care way too much about how other people think about me in the sense that I don't want to make them mad or feel hurt by me.”

7. My dream job? Something creative (I love designing fabric prints/patterns) in a big city, pays well enough, and benefits like vacation time. So that I can finally travel like I’m so desperately yearning to.

8. I miss Alix. I still have no idea why “the big man upstairs” took her away, and I don’t think it’ll ever make sense to me. Nor do I hope to ever forget her. I hope I can move onto a more hopeful way of thinking about it, but I still don’t ever want to forget her. But it still makes me sad… I just try to…keep it in the background, faded out. Every so often, it makes its way to the forefront of my mind and it takes a while to shake the feelings.

9. I’m such a dork for board games. Cranium, Apples to Apples (JUST played that for the first time tonight), really, anything. Nothing would make me happier than a night of board games with close friends. I can’t explain it, but I love it.

10. I stress about weight loss. Being back at school slowed it down so incredibly much, I realize that my bad habits from before my surgery are still here, and I freak out about it stopping. Not because there’s some absolute ideal size I want to be, but more honestly, in disappointing my parents (who funded the whole damn thing) and family.

11. My feet are freakin oddities. Shoes are my favorite things in the world, but it’s about impossible to fit the width of my feet in CUTE shoes, and that makes me sad.

12. I don’t drive, and I can’t explain why I don’t. I often told people (in Raleigh) that I just didn’t have a car in Raleigh, but I don’t even have a license. (Yes, bad bad bad.) In high school, the idea of driving never interested me, oddly enough, and I’ve let it slowly scare (?) me. I just have no desire to do so, and losing Alix in a car accident increased my general disdain/fear of driving. I really don’t know where/why it started, but I’ve just put a mental block on the whole idea, and I know it’s not good. (But it’s one of those things that I DON’T want friends/family teaching me. When the time comes, I’m going to pay someone/a driving school to teach me.)

13. In regards to number twelve, the not driving drives (ha ha) me insane when I’m home. I’m such an independent person, but in Greensboro (especially where I live), I’m pretty much STUCK here. Nothing is in close walking distance, in terms of stores or even bus stops. I’m totally not ashamed to use public transportation!

14. I really do love food. I enjoy cooking and baking for people, having people over for meals, going out with friends to nice restaurants. It’s more of the whole experience than the food alone, and even after my surgery, I refuse to separate it from my life.

15. I love being near water – oceans, lakes, even just hot tubs and pools. It’s the most relaxing experience, and the natural forms are usually such beautiful sights.

16. I have a tendency to pick apart myself and my choices in my brain, and I don’t like to share it with other people… Unless it’s something like this or a blog, where only people that would WANT to hear/read about it will. I don’t like burdening others with my constant mental preoccupations.

I choose (and diplomatically list alphabetically):
Blaire: because you’re totally sweet and although we haven’t known each other long, we clicked.
Christine: because we definitely have a history, and some sort of crazy friendship I can’t quite explain.
Evan: because all my poppy guilty pleasures don’t feel so guilty when I’m with you!
Jen: because you’ve kept me sane while in Greensboro…
Jenna: because, although I knew you were awesome before, you made my last semester of college amazingly fun!
Lisa: because you make me laugh, and you have a great taste in drinks.
Mano: because you’re my favorite cousin, and I just adore you.
Meghan: because you’re totally sweet and I want to know more about you.
Misha: because you and I have similar tastes and your sarcasm is awesome.
Mor: because you’re an absolute visionary, and you inspire me.
Ricky: because you’re a nice guy that entertains me. That says quite a bit.
Sara: because I honestly don’t know what I would do without you in my life.
Sarah Ewald: because you have great taste and a lot of the balls I want to have one day.
Sarah Wheeler: because you were my freakin mentor first semester freshman year and we’re still friends!
Shira: because you took me in (as a virtual stranger) this summer, and helped me spread my cosmopolitan wings.
Suhad: because of Barbies, Barbies, Barbies years ago. And because I recently realized how awesome you are.

Oh, two more. My original taggers!
Brittany: because we totally are soulmates.
Sheena: because no matter how long we go without seeing each other, we fall right back into sync in a comfortable friendship.

Everyone tagged is obviously awesome, because I wouldn’t just want anyone to know all this stuff about me…

And I included the list of tagged friends because, well, I love them. :)

I'm in NEW YORK!

Yesterday afternoon, I arrived in New York City! I am sooo excited!

I am staying with my loverly buddy and soon-to-be partner in crime Shira. I have to say, OH is a wonderful thing. I've met a lot of friends on there, and without it, I honestly don't know if I would have come this far post-op.

I had a feeling things would be good between me and Shira, but they've really clicked even better than expected. Yeah, it's only 24 hours into it (literally... I got to her apartment at like 12:15pm Sunday), but I'm feeling good about things.

The city is amazing (and I haven't barely seen ANY of it). It's definitely big and daunting, but I LOVE the convenience factor and just allllllllllll the options of stores and things to do. Weeeee! I'm very excited. Hopefully, today will be a bit more of learning about the subway and the buses, so I can figure stuff out on my own.

Yesterday, I bought my Metrocard and we rode the subway. (My first time...cherry is popped!) We went to Bed, Bath & Beyond and spent way too much money on me (well, Shira spent way too much money on me. Because she's sweet like that). We got a rolling storage/closet thing for all my clothes and shoes and stuff, and kitcheny stuff (yay popsicle molds!) and just a lot of general stuff. And then we went to Food Emporium, a very nice grocery store where we picked up some foods.

We cabbed it back home since our BB&B stuff was big and heavy. We started putting the closet thing together...that was a trip. Why do we need instructions when we can figure it out ourselves? Oh, that's right, because we'll take it apart and have to put it back together a number of different times. Hahaha.

After setting that up and the Aerobed and stuff, we headed back out and just explored a bit of Astoria. Checked out the $0.99 store, walked around. We came back, and had originally planned on cooking. But after a while, carbing out was decided instead. Oh, and fatting out. We ordered some greasy diner delivery and watched History of the World Part I. I knew I loved Mel Brooks, but this was friggin hilarious. :)

Today, I think we're going to do some more exploring, past the east side. But it's been a lazy day so far. Wish me luck, there's a LOT to learn, but I'm excited!

Saturday = Uber Awesome

This is more of an off-topic post, I just felt like writing about how great my Saturday was. :D

Around 2, my friend Jen and I left to go out. We went to Walmart, and I found a SF Hazelnut Davinci syrup! And some nice socks for a good price. So now I have a big bottle of Vanilla SF Davinci, and small bottles of Raspberry, Kahlua, Caramel and Hazelnut.

After Wal-mart, we made our way over to the mall... I hadn't been in the mall since June. We walked around for a while, and ran into a friend from middle school, Farzana. It was nice to see her - she graduated, is working as a teacher. Glad to see she's doing wel;l. It's funny, I always tend to run into her in the mall, I think. We walked around some more, then went to lunch at Ruby Tuesday's. Yay salad bar!!! Unfortunately, I didn't bring my salad dressing spritz stuff, so I went with the Light Ranch. It was still a littler carbier than I probably should have had. It was odd, because our waiter was this guy that went to Rolling Roads pool with me. Yeah, now that's a reunion of ages. He was so familiar, but I couldn't place him. He recognized me, and after talking for a moment, he figured out how we knew each other.

After lunch, we went downstairs to the first floor of the mall, and wonderfully ran into my friend Kaytee, who was getting off from work at Aveda. I haven't seen her in quite a while, and I'd been meaning to get together with her, just hang out. I miss some of my older buddies, and man, we've known each other since we were 11!!! So, since me and Jen were happening to be going to the movies, and Kaytee and her fiance Adam were planning the same, we decided we'd go see the same movie later in the evening. I was very excited to meet Adam, since I had heard so many wonderful things about him!

Between seeing Kaytee and going to the movies, I spent $50 in MORE protein stuff, Jen found an awesome shirt with an awesome price at Lane Bryant, we bought hair dye at CVS, Jen found a great suit jacket and blouse at Macy's, and we had dinner at Rock-Ola with Kaytee and Adam. Seriously, it was so awesome to spend time with Kaytee and to meet/get to know Adam some. I really approve, and I'm so happy for Kaytee. She deserves everything she has and more, and I'm just happy she's found a really good guy for her. It was also nice to reminisce about some older memories, and learn some things that I....was not aware of.

After dinner, we saw Dan in Real Life - an okay movie. Very cliche, but I guess I didn't find it half bad. Me and Jen came back to my house, and we had a small Hair Dye Party!!! Jen dyed her hair red, and mine is now black. Heh, so darkest brown Nice N Easy goes black on my hair - tis life! And that's what you ask for when using home hair dye - it can be a mixed bag! So that was interesting... Well, the whole day was. I really really enjoyed it, and I'm a very happy girl now. :D

My one and only complaint is that I think I ate too much/too many carbs and/or fat. Plz check my Fitday (I linked it a few posts down)... keep my butt in check!!!